Supermassive Black Hole

Living with a supermassive black hole

To where all energy (light or otherwise) will go to be absorbed into oblivion

To where all seems to go to remain gone.

And yet, at the other end, there’s infinity

Which I thought had been engulfed to perhaps be transformed

And then goes to become an abyss

Maybe Lavoisier didn’t know better

Maybe Nietzsche did or just pretended he did

Maybe I became the supermassive black hole I have gazed into for too long

Maybe I needed the abyss to draw dark matter and light

Maybe I have been the one pulling energy and matter all this time…

I thought I have been living with a supermassive black hole

And I thought I could look out for the stars without interference

And yet my gravitational pull is crushing them and dragging them towards me

As the laws of Nature so predicted.

I believed I had the knowledge to protect me

But even science can’t fight Nature

It can only attempt to measure it, define it. Never control it.

But the supermassive black hole inside me craves control

Because losing control means losing power

Losing control means losing the support of these so-called laws

Losing control means the supermassive abyss might become nothing

And the abyss might seem devoided but in the end, it never is.

In Nature, nothing is created.

Nothing is lost.

Everything is transformed.

But is a supermassive black hole, meant to capture all light and good matter, supposed to be transformed?

How can it morph into something that will give light?

How can it morph into an asteroid?

How can it morph into a life-sustaining planet?

All I see now is the abyss.

Because I have gazed into it for too damn long. And I see no light.

I became the abyss I looked out for and now I can’t turn into a supernova.

I might explode into a ray of light and dust and be forgotten.

But Lavoisier said nothing is ever lost…

But maybe he’s wrong.